Remember those signs in GreekTown that said, "BEST VIDEO POKER IN
TOWN! --Bob Dancer. Now I want my chance:
"WORST VIDEO POKER IN TOWN!" --VP Pappy
Do you think they'll put that sign up around the place?
I spent three hours yesterday roaming around every nick and cranny
at the new MGM Grand looking for something to play that gave me a
chance to stay at least even for a while. I guess I could have played
Blackjack and got within a percent or so, but I wanted to play video
poker. I did enjoy a couple of JW Red's on the rocks at $7 a pop.
I saw maybe a hundred bright, new and shiny GameMaker HD machines
with their low-paying games (including Rip-Off Pick'Em) and I saw
lots of Game Kings with their low-paying lousy games, but after
searching everywhere, I found nada, nilch, zero of anything but
losers.. The worst I found was an $5 8/5 JB machine. If the high
rollers can't get a fair shake, what chance do we, the poor, pathetic
suckers (the way the casino sees us) who like to play quarter vp have.
I did, out of boredom, play some low-paying games and soon I was
down $350. Then I got lucky and hit four Aces for $200 on an 8/5/4
DDB machine and got back some of my money. But, never again!
This is a beautiful place. The state of the art in casinos. The
bars and restaurants are wonderful-although most of them were closed.
I would love to stay in this place for a weekend with my wife and
enjoy the amenities. I don't mind paying for quality. However I sure
as hell wouldn't be playing any non-quality video poker.
The poker room is where I would spend most of my time. At least
you have a chance there if you know how to play the game...and I do.
But, you can't be with your wife when you play that game.
"No man is an island...except when he plays poker."
--VP Pappy
Maybe we could get "The Slot Guy" to buy that old Game King's
progressive bank with 9/7/5 DB game on them. Let's face it, very few
players know how to play that game correctly what with holding three
to a flush and going for inside straights all the time, so they will
make money. Maybe I'll buy them and start my own casino. I am related
on my mother's side (French fur trappers) to Sockajewiener, or
whatever her name was that went on the Lewis and Clark expedition.
MGM has has made their very expensive choice, now let's see if
they read the mostly blue-collar public right or not. If they guessed
wrong, they are going to lose just about every vp player in the area
to GT or MC. And, some heads will roll. I'm hoping that somewhere
down the line they will decide that vp players do make money for them
and put in some "fair" machines. Although I wouldn't bet on it.
"WORST VIDEO POKER IN TOWN!" --VP Pappy
"Let's be honest, we would all like to take the casinos for all
their worth and you can bet your sweet bippy they feel the same way
about us."
--VP Pappy