Playing the lone slot machine in an empty casino ...
I can SO relate. I have arthritis in my back and legs, and diabetes. I
play slots late night so I can select an empty bank of machines, prop
myself at the one I like best and put my legs up on the chair next to
me. I swear to gawd, this has happened more than once: I'll select a
machine, the casino is mostly empty (meaning hundreds of slots and three
people left awake and playing), and I put my legs up, lean back and
enjoy a slow quiet time playing -- for about three minutes. Then
someone will come up to me and ask if they can play the machine where I
have propped up my legs. I use to be polite and just move away. NO
MORE!!
I found the perfect solution, courtesy of a girlfriend who passed it on
to me. I have tried it a dozen times and it worked every time -- *thank
you H1N1 Swine Flu virus.* First time I used it, I was sitting at a
bank of machines, legs up, relaxing, and the "bitch" approaches. At
first, she stands behind the chair propping my feet, hoping I'll notice
and say something. Not anymore! I just ignore her and keep on playing.
Then she clears her throat - which of course distracts me more than her
standing over me. I give her a "Don the Dentist" dirty look, to no
avail, and I don't smoke so no cigar. The "bitch" is locked in place.
I state rudely, "I'm not moving my feet, so go play one of the other
hundred machines in here." She, just as rudely, points at the little
sign on the machine that says, "Only one machine to a player." Fine!
Damn it! I move my legs and decide to give my friend's idea a try. As
soon as the "bitch" gets settled and begins to play, I start hacking. A
nice open mouth, turned toward her, cough with spittle. I mean, I carry
on like asthmatic on the verge of dying. Coughing all over the machine,
wiping my mouth with my hand and then wiping my hand across the slot
buttons and on my skirt. Damn, so sorry, no Kleenex *evil grin.* Hack,
hack, hack, pause, take a drink of water, cough and choke half way
through it so it sprays. Then I say, "Sorry, some of my family has the
Swine Flu. That's why I'm here getting away from it. But this damn
cough hit me off and on today, and I think I have a fever. That's why I
tried to find somewhere away from everyone. Real contagious I hear. I
was playing that machine you're on but it wasn't *pause, long hack again
in her direction, mouth open, spittle flying* sorry, paying much."
More hacking if she hasn't gathered her shit and run for the border -
which has happened each time within minutes of them sitting down and
getting hacked. I swear, it has worked every time. Then I pull out one
of my Clorox wipes and wipe down the machine and continue on in peace
and quiet.
In fact, I've only had one confrontation. The last time I did it, the
"bitch of the day" asked to play the machine where my feet were propped.
Ten thousand empty machines in the place and she wants the one next to
me. I moved my legs and I was pissy, and she knew it. I did my hacking
cough fit. She was mortified, bitched blatantly about it, scooted her
chair over to the edge of her machine (this was actually getting fun for
me) and tried to continue her play. More hacking from me and then the
water spray. Only a tiny bit a spittle spray even caught her, and she
threw her chair back and stood up, glaring at me. I couldn't help it -
it was funny - I laughed (actually choked myself on the water for real
and had to cough some more). Now, she was pissed off. She called
security over and said I was purposely trying to make her move. I
looked up at him, like the fallen victim, sad eyes, batted my eyelashes,
said, "Sorry I have a cough I can't control, you know how that is! I
was here first, check your cameras. Hundreds more machines around. And
*lean in close to him and whisper* she's a bit of a nutcase, stroked my
leg when she first sat down *raise my eyebrows, give him the look at the
nut nod* and I think I hurt her feelings when I turned her advance down.
Can't help that, I like boys! Plus, I was here first, I'm not a
nutcase, and I'm not moving." Then I smiled real big and said, "But I
always like chatting it up with a cute security guard, so it's not a
total loss for me!" Then I discretely turn, cover my mouth, and have a
little coughing fit. "Sorry sir, just trying to relax my way through
this cold."
*LOL* It was brutal. He asked her to find another machine. She got
more pissed. How dare he side with me. She stood up and began yelling
at him. I sat quietly behind her, making the crazy hand signal and eye
rolls, mouthing words she could not hear, "See! Nuts! Everything sets
her off." He started to say something else to her, and she started
screaming again, so this time I made the "lady needs protected move." I
stood up like I was afraid she would explode on more than him and
stepped behind the security guard so he could protect me. He reached
for his radio on his shoulder and in minutes, four burly security guards
escorted her away. You know what, it was worth the distraction and
aggravation just to see her face as she was escorted away. It made my
day!!! *big grin*
I've come across this type quite a bit in the casinos. As EE stated,
they will step up behind you and watch you play for like 15 minutes.
Some of them are actually waiting for you to leave the machine so they
can have it, and hope that their presence will aggravate you enough to
vacate the machine. And when you don't move, they will settle in a
machine or two over and play the least amount of coins they can while
watching you intently. As soon as you move, they jump into your seat
and don't vacate it for hours. I'm no longer Miss Polite. It's f**k
you, go find another machine, you stupid bitches.
So, give the hack and spittle Swine Flu a try and let me know how it
works for you!
Rana
Can you please explain something?
I like to play VP early in the morning, with a cup of coffee, when the
casinos are dead and cigarette smoke is non existent.
Why is it that I'll be playing on a lone machine on a bank of 20
machines, you know, just relaxed, I might even have my arm draped over
the chair next to me. Getting settled in for some advantage play. Then
all of a sudden from out of no where somebody comes up and sits right
beside me. Not only do I have rearrange everything, but then inevitably
they light up. Of all the open machines to play they feel the need to
sit right beside me. (I'm not that attractive) 
Does this ever happen to any of you?
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--- In vpFREE@yahoogroups.com, "terry_5935" <terry_5935@...> wrote: