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--- In vpFREE@yahoogroups.com, "futrend" <futrend@y...> wrote:
knowledge in this area.
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Bob,
Maybe this article that I wrote last year will help you to
understand slot machines a little better. It's kinda long so print
it out and study it later.
TM
THE SIXTY MOST IMPORTANT THINGS I'VE LEARNED ABOUT PLAYING SLOT
MACHINES
By Terrence "VP Pappy" Murphy
"Blessed be the slot players for theirs is the hope of a better day
dawning."
--Frank Scoblete
Slot machines are fun to play, but that fun comes with a price. Most
of the people who play the slots will lose, and that will probably
include you if you decide to play them. And if you can't accept that
fact of casino life, then you are in for some un-fun-like times when
you gamble. For the most part, when you play the slots, luck and
luck alone decides who wins and who loses. Yes, there's a chance
that you might hit a very large jackpot, but realistically, you have
about the same chance of hitting your state's lottery. Even knowing
all that, I still play them on occasion myself. Why? Because, like I
said before, they're fun to play, and I like to have fun when I
gamble.
With the help of gambling legend VP Pappy, here are some things that
we've learned over the years about playing slot machines that may be
of some help to you when you challenge the odds and try to beat
these money-munching-monsters of financial mayhem.
"If it wasn't for all the money I keep losing, this gambling thing
could be a lot of fun."
--VP Pappy
1. All slot machines are random, and short of cheating, which could
land you in jail, there's nothing you can do to alter that fact.
2. A typical 45 to 90 coin video display slot machine "seems" to
have a better return than a typical 3-coin spinning reels game.
3. A computer chip inside a slot machine is generating random
numbers all the time, even when no one is playing. So, even if
someone did hit the jackpot on the very next spin on the machine you
just left, it wouldn't mean that they hit "your" jackpot.
4. Most slot machines are set at 85-95 percent payback.
5. Play the single pay line machines only. I seemed to of had better
luck on them over the years than the multiple line kind.
"Psychologically, the one element of the game that keeps the slot
devotee tied to the machine is the possibility, no matter how
remote, of hitting the jackpot. The promise of the monster, life
affirming win, the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, the
philosopher's stone that can cure all their ills, pay off all their
debts, and smooth the path of life forever, and ever, and ever."
--Gambling For Dummies
6. A casino can and will deny you a jackpot if they decide that a
malfunction caused the win.
7. A change in the machine's pay back percentage can only be
accomplished by physically changing the computer chip inside the
machine and there must be a gaming board officer present to witness
it. Although, in some states, all the casino has to do is file a
written request with the gaming commission.
8. Today's slot players are the backbone of all casinos and they are
babied, pampered, and highly sought after.
9. Push the spin button, pull the handle, or do both at the same
time, it makes no difference in the outcome.
10. Most slot players play until they have lost all their money.
"Never get between a serious slot player and his or her machine.
Slot players are much like the mother bear with her cub I once met
mountain biking."
--Mark Pilarski
11. Nickel slots are usually set at 80-90 percent payback.
12. Five dollar slots are usually set at 95-98 percent payback.
13. Never play two or more machines at the same time. The odds are
tough enough to beat playing just one, let alone more than one.
14. A player's card is used by the casino to keep track of your coin
in and coin out so they can reward you for your play with comps and
cashbacks.
15. The symbols on the reels of a slot machine is just there for
show. Once you hit the spin button, the random number generator has
already chosen the result before the reels come to a stop.
"Slot stuffers, by the large, don't want to be flustered by anything
as philosophical as facts."
--Alan Krigman
16. If you have the time and the patience, sit at a spot that has a
clear view of another bank of slot machines, especially a bank that
advertises that their machines pay "up to 98%," or some other
percentage. Watch and record in a notebook which ones seem to pay
off more than the others and play those exclusively.
17. Although slot machines may look different, they all work
essentially the same way.
18. Money management and discipline are the only tactics that can
save you money in the long run.
19. It is more than likely that you will never hit one of those
giant jackpots. Very few do. Look for machines that pay the most for
the secondary wins.
20. Look for machines that have cherries, double and triple pay
symbols. You'll have a better chance to hit something of substance
in the short term.
"I can understand why players are scared of the new high-tech slot
machines. Hell, I'm still scared of the old ones."
--VP Pappy
21. Winning at slots can be as simple as leaving the machine when
you are losing, and staying when you are winning.
22.. Linked, progressive slot machines have a much lower pay back
(80-85 percent) than non-progressive slot machines.
23. On the slots, you must set your win goals lower and take those
small wins and leave, or at least move to another machine.
24. Never leave a machine on a winning streak. Set a loss in a row
limit, then move on to a new machine.
25. Your bankroll determines what denomination machine you should
play.
" Grandma, you don't have to cash out," I told her. "The credits
will build up as long as you play, and you can play off those
credits if you like." She smiled, almost guiltily then answered: "I
like the sound."
--Anthony Curtis
26. Slot machines are not fixed to cheat you. They are set to pay
out a certain percentage over a long period of time.
27. If you have no discipline, no money management skills, and just
can't stick to those win/loss limits, then you will most likely lose
almost every time you play.
28. Today's modern computer-chip slots "could" have as many as
several billion different combinations on a typical machine.
29. If a casino "does" have loose machines, they "may" be near the
entrance, near the cages, on the ends of aisles, on carousels, or
any place where people congregate.
30. Other than casino execs, who decide on machine placement, no one
working at the casinos know where the loose machines are, or even if
there are any.
"They sit there, all bright and shiny, with their left arm pointed
to heaven, of all places, pleading with you to fill their stomachs
with your silver dollars, quarters, anything."
--John Patrick
31. A slot machine will pay out at the same percentage whether its
day, night, a weekday, or a weekend.
32. There is no system for winning at the slots, only a way to make
your monies last longer to give you a shot at luck.
33. Playing today's new video slot machines, you get the same
percentage of payback whether you bet one coin or 90.
34. An empty slot machine during busy hours "could" mean that
everyone who has played it has lost and moved on.
35. There is no such thing as a slot machine that is overdue to hit.
"A drunken monkey can be as successful at slots as a sober Einstein."
--Bob Dancer
36. In most casinos, only a few slot machines will be programmed to
return in excess of 95%.
37. It is highly unlikely that you will ever play a slot machine
long enough to experience the theoretical payoff percentage.
38. If you are fortunate enough to hit a large jackpot, under no
circumstances, play it again until you are paid off. In fact, stand
up, back off, and wait for an attendant.
39. Most of the machines in the big casinos are tied to computers
where executives can look at a readout any time they want, to check
out a machine's behavior.
40. If you are playing on a progressive machine, and you are either
winning or losing a little, don't leave! Stay as long as you can.
This is, temporarily at least, a good machine!
"It's really stupid and embarrassing to keep pleading with a slot
machine as if it were alive and could actually hear me. I'd stop
doing it but I'm afraid I'll make it angry and it won't give me a
win."
--VP Pappy
41. Finding the loosest machines in a casino is the key to winning.
How to find them, is the dilemma.
42. Even if you did somehow manage to find the casino's loosest
machines, and if you played them millions of times, you would still
eventually go broke, only slower.
43. Sometimes the maximum number of coins in a lower denomination
machine doesn't pay back as much as a single coin in a higher
denomination.
44. When you choose to play the slots, you must be prepared
psychologically, to lose all your gambling stake.
45. Make it a habit to always hit the cash out button when you leave
a machine, even if you are sure that you have no credits left.
"Look, you know you want to hit. You're due to hit. You need to hit.
I promise, I'll take you out of here. I'll polish you. You're a good
machine. HIT NOW!!!"
-- Mellisa Raimondi
46. It's been my experience (or maybe my imagination?) that the
tightest machines are placed around the table-game pits, with the
end machine, the one facing the pits, the worst.
47. All slot placement decisions have been made with a single
thought in mind: encouraging more slot play and increasing the slot
play of the people currently at the machines.
48. Never play the four and five coin slot machines. The percentages
are no better, and you will just lose your money faster.
49. In a typical bank of 12 slot machines, the probable placement
might be something like this: One loose, three tight, and the rest
midrange.
50. One of the most important things you can do to get something
back of value from a casinos, is to join their slot or player's club.
"Question: "What's your favorite game?"
"The new slot machine with monkeys and bananas that goes bloop,
bloop, bloop!"
--Wendy Liebman (comedian)
51. Don't get locked into the financial insanity of
thinking "Jackpot! Jackpot! Instead, think, " Small win! Small win!
Small wins are good! Like a bird building it's nest, twig by twig,
so must you build your bankroll, small win by small win.
52. If you play with credits using the bill acceptor, put in a
single $5 or $10 bill, and when you double your money, or lose your
credits, move on.
53. Keep an eye out for the banked bonus slots (Piggy Bankin, Wild
Cherry Pie, Buccaneer Gold etc.) that have a high bonus that someone
has abandoned. Play one coin at a time only until you get it, or
until you lose the amount of the bonus, then move on.
54. Build up a notebook filled with the best paying slot machines in
each casino you frequent. Write down the type, serial number,
location, and win/loss figures. Keeping a record is the only way to
chart honestly how you are doing.
55. Talk to the other players and casino personnel about where the
loosest machines could possibly be found. Although they may not
know, there's no harm in asking, and every bit of information helps.
"It is not uncommon to see a lady in her bridal gown, married
moments ago by a minister in full Elvis regalia, furiously working
the slots with a Marlboro clenched between her teeth."
--Rob Wiser
56. If you want to keep your losses down while wait for luck to
happen, play the two-coin machines only.
57. Keep up to date when the casinos have those bonus days: like
when they give double-or triple-points. Play on those days only.
58. Generally, the loosest slots will be found in the Las Vegas
casinos.
59. Keep the promises you make to yourself. Leave when you reach
your win or loss limit.
60. And finally, my absolutely best advice is to buy some video
poker software, learn how to play video poker perfectly, and forget
the slots altogether. Video poker has a much higher return.
"Slots have no memory. They are a mindless collection of metal,
silicon and plastic. They don't know whether they have hit a jackpot
on the previous play or haven't paid off since Reagan was in the
White House."
--Lou Krieger & Arthur Reber
You put your money in, the reels spin, and you take your chances at
fame and fortune. What could be simpler? That's the allure of slots,
and that's also the trap. It's one of the few gambling games that I
know of where just staying even is almost as hard to do as winning.
I sincerely wish all of you the best of luck, because without it,
you're doomed to defeat.
"He who wins, and runs away, will live to gamble another day."
--VP Pappy