I'll spare everyone my usual wit. I'm too busy for wit
these days. It has been 9 months since my last visit to Vegas and I
have only been in a casino once in the last six months --A highly
unusual state of affairs for me. Doing double duty at work, Surgery
(painful but mundane), a house hunt and move haven't left much time
for the usual fun stuff. I was relieved as hell to get out of
Chicago and fully ready to do something seriously frivolous and
meaningfully inconsequential. You know, risk a roll, eat a fried
twinky and revisit the freak show that is Las Vegas.
TRANSPORT
Air: Flying AA out of O' Hare with a FC upgrade with miles, a free
flight with credit card points and I get to park in the nearby short
term lot for free. Don't ask! We didn't intend to upgrade to FC on
the return flight, but the automated kiosk offers the upgrade for
$135. As FC upgrades go, this is kind of a deal and we do it. It
is a 7:30 AM flight and not much sleep was had on our final night.
The extra room to snooze will be good. I've never had the kiosk
make that offer before. Both flights departed close to on time and
arrived early. Nothing eventful occurred.
Cab: Yes we cab it to our downtown destination. Both cabbies are,
by outward appearances, sane and no one tries to rip me off.
Car Rental: Budget at the Four Queens kiosk. The rental clerk
walks that fine line between surly and just unfriendly. Sweet. I
am required to have DL, credit card and yet another form of ID. The
requirement for the third ID is unexpected and I have to make a dash
to my safe deposit box as I only carry cash, DL and primary CC while
in Vegas. No hard sells on gas, insurance or upgrade. We reserve
economy for 3 of our 5 nights in town for a price of $100 and are
given what I imagine they consider a midsize, the Chevy Malibu. The
gas tank was only ¾ full and the car was filthy which required a
trip back down to the kiosk to have them correct.
HOTEL
Four Queens: For the last couple of years we have usually been
Caesars customers, but I lobbied for a downtown stay this trip Just
as well, as Caesars gutted their vp inventory after our plans were
made. The 4 Qs is a compromise between Nancy and I. I wanted best
possible vp play and she wanted to be in the thick of Fremont. I
settle for a DB prog with decent CB and Nancy gets Fremont.
We did not mistake our room at the Four Queens for Caesars Augustus
Tower, but it seemed competitive to what I have experienced with
other rooms downtown
Aside from the GN, of course. The room had
gone through a modest redecoration with the addition of a flat panel
LCD TV and, I presume, furniture. Bathroom was tiny and clean, but
did not appear to be renovated.
The benefits of having downtown digs are pretty obvious, but I'll
run through them. It doesn't take a half hour to get up to your
room and back from any given point in the casino, as it could seem
to at Caesars. Comps are much easier. Good VP and other gambling
options are superior to the Strip and easy to get to. It's quick
and easy to bounce from one casino to another downtown.
DINING
Magnolias: Food was diner passable and service was average. It's a
pretty easy comp, but how many Loco Mocos can one man eat? Answer:
At least 2 in 5 days.
Hugo's Cellar: I've been going to Vegas often for many years, yet
I've never been to this Las Vegas standard. I knew right away it
was old school when I saw the bowl of Ritz crackers on the bar.
Nancy and I enjoyed it and thought it was a good value. The salad
prepared tableside to your specs is a nice gimmick as are the post
dinner chocolate dipped fruit and long stem rose. I wonder who gets
the rose if two dudes are dining together. Maybe they wrestle for
it? Anyway, I had the rack of lamb with an Indonesian spice rub and
sauce. I'm a sucker for Indonesian food. While it was no
rijstafel, it was pretty good. The rub had a little kick and the
sauce, served in a separate vessel was basically a peanut satay.
Nancy's New York Strip was prepared to her liking and a good cut.
Lilly's Noodles: Yes, never went to the old upstairs Lilly
Langtry's either though I stayed at the GN several times while they
still had a few playable vp machines. Apparently the Lilly's
reincarnation is downstairs. I had a yen for Chinese and the need
to eat an actual vegetable on our fifth night of LV dining. You
know, something besides a steamed carrot the size of a keno pencil
placed on the platter for purely decorative purposes. My extra
spicy kung pao chicken and Chinese broccoli in oyster sauce filled
the bill nicely. The food was good, room was attractive and service
was very efficient, but do not expect a bargain.
Fremont Buffet: We did the Sunday brunch. Well, it was better than
the Majestic Star buffet back in NW Indiana (which is like saying I
didn't break down and weep when I saw the offerings on the steam
tables) and it was cheap with the LVA 241 coupon. Can't say I would
recommend it.
Garduno's: Nancy wanted Mexican and a sopapilla. We were in the
area and knew we had comps. The Palms was really hopping that night
for some reason. Surely it couldn't have been the stupid beach
towel give away they were running? There was a wait and they gave us
a little buzzer to carry around. Unfortunately the little buzzer
didn't work and every time we went up to inquire they said they had
already buzzed us. It took them 45 minutes or so to figure this
out, but I won't complain too much. The extra time allowed me to
stumble on to a very nice play.
I enjoy the salsa's drinks and apps at Garduno's, but I am seldom
impressed by their entrees. My taco sampler was blahhh and I wished
I had gone with the tamales after the first bite. Our whirling
dervish of a waiter was fast
a little too fast as dinner was on
the table as I was taking the second bite of my appetizer.
Chicago Brewing Co: The tiny bar is upstairs overlooking the casino
floor. They do a lot of micro brews, though I only imbibed one.
The IPA I chose mostly for the greater alcohol content and it was
OK. The girl taking orders and pouring drafts was friendly and
efficient. A couple of the appetizers were decent (southwest
eggrolls and sliders) and the thin crust pizza was surprisingly
good. I was expecting something pretty bad. They even cut it into
little squares like they do in sweet home Chicago. It was a welcome
refuge from Magnolias.
Subway: Nothing is sadder than eating at a fast food franchise
restaurant while on vacation. OK, there is famine and war, but
dining alone at the Subway above the Four Queens casino floor has to
be a close third.
Krispy Kreme: Krispy gives good (and free) wifi and there's no sin
in Sin City like snarfing an original glazed and coffee in the
morning immediately followed by your blood sugar meds. At least
that is what it has come to for me.
Gambling: Bad news/good news. As I've mentioned, I have been very
busy. I usually research plays, practice and study and drill, but I
had no time to do any of that. I had time to quickly save some site
pages to my jump drive so that I could refer to them on Nancy's
laptop later. I wasn't much better prepared than your average
tourist.
My live poker game absolutely sucked. No, that's sugar coating it.
I hadn't played but once in the last six months and I totally lost
what few skills I had as a newby player during that inactivity.
Weak and tight most of the time. Just pathetic. I played an NLHE
cash game and melted down in the sixth hour of that session.
Another 5 hour session of LHE with a total lack of concentration. I
donked off stacks in 3 tournaments: The $200 noon tournament at
Caesars (40 minute levels); the $150 shoot out at Binion's (30
minute levels; the $70 daily $40 rebuy at Binion's (20 minute
levels.) I was pretty disgusted with myself and I will definitely
be working on my game before my next poker outing.
By chance this visit to LV was made during the WSOP. I went down to
the Rio to check out the scene and caught the beginning of a PLHE
tournament. I saw Phil Laak and crazy hat Korean lady (forgot her
name), and, I think, Shannon Elizabeth and Andrew Black. If you're
not playing there's not much reason to hang around and we bugged out
pretty quickly.
I caught lucky playing VP. I knew the majority of my play would be
DB, but I have never played the game much and didn't have time to
drill. My play was weak, but I started catching quads immediately
My first set of aces within minutes of arriving.
The plan was to stick to quarter play and I pretty much did that at
the Four Queens. My trip stake definitely did not support $DB play
this visit, but I happened on to the Palms DB prog on Sunday evening
and the royal was over $5K. I haven't seen the Palms DB prog up
that high since it first opened. Maybe it was unusual. Maybe they
speeded the meter up. Maybe I've just been unlucky in my very
intermittent trips to the Palms and missed it when it was high.
With the exception of the non bonus quads the other meters were up
in the 10%+ to 25%+ range also. I guestimated return at over 101%.
Later analysis showed it at approximately 101.5% and return was
probably better for locals who could make the Palms slot club work
for them. There were a couple of hogs playing 2 machines or saving
a seat, but I saw one open and decided to allocate a little of my
trip stake to take a shot before we were called to dinner. I caught
the SF for $300+ and the aces for $850+ within about 20 minutes of
play. I hated not to keep chasing the royal, but knew that given
the funds I had allocated for this session I had been lucky. I
cashed out about $900 in profit and celebrated with a Pacifico.
Bottom line, my vp wins more than made up for my live poker losses.
Free Crap: We did about 40K in play over 5 nights at the Four
Queens Less than half of what we would have done at Caesars. With
little previous play at Four Queens we came in at casino rate.
Sara, a host, comped room and all meals with the exception of
Hugo's. Hugo's requires about 4000 points ($32K) in a day for a
comp according to Sara. We collected $125 in CB. Additionally, 4
Qs began running a promotion in the middle of our stay. Earn 400
points and receive $25 free play. Earn 1000 points and get an
additional $50 in free play. Earn 2500 points and get an old timey
looking juke box radio cd player thing. It was a pain in the butt
to lug home. They made a mistake and gave Nancy $100 total in free
play. They realized the mistake when we went to collect the juke
box, but the FP was already used. I tried to console them by
letting them know Nancy didn't win anything with it and thanked them
for the extra $25.
Every 17 Years: Driving home from O'hare past the forest preserves
and old wooded areas I rolled down the windows. The sound of the
Cicadas crashed into our ears like a wave. The sound of a thousand
buzz saws unseen just behind the trees. The big bugs seemed clumsy
and barely be able to keep themselves in the air as they
occasionally popped on the windshield. Nancy rolled up her window
just to be safe. I left mine open and reveled their enthusiasm. 17
years from now, if I am still around and their forest hasn't been
paved over, I will hear the descendents of these creatures again.
The world is a strange and interesting place.
Chandler