Here's a special treat for the geek who likes to feel he's some sort
of a gift to video poker forums--and who has a BURNING envy inside of
Rob Singer.
While he's clesrly shown he's had few if any experiences in the world
outside of local casino joints, it's also abundantly clear the only
way he knows much other than the mixed up nerdy logic that runs his
life is by reading the Internet. Well he flubbed that up too, when he
could read but couldn't understand the difference between sector-
driven dialects and a language in Pakistan. It's also clear the fool
got roped into moving to Las Vegas - like so many other jerks with
itchy fingers and sweaty palms for the video poker machines. Yes, now
he has to live with that decision, and the humiliation and miserable
life that goes along with it. For this reason I'm giving him another
lesson today in the form of an article that appeared in Gaming Today--
his favorite gaming read--on May 18th 2002. And guess who wrote it?
Yup, his nemisis and idol.
I'm also going to take a break from sticking it to him for a while in
order to get things done before the holidays hit. Yes, the HOLIDAYS
mean something around here. They're not just another bunch of 'double
points days' or 'card-of-the-day' addict-grabbing promotions. It's
all about family, the enjoyment of NORMAL things in life, and
spending quality time with those who want to be with....and not
inside some degenerage, smokey, smelly local casino as the guest of
some casino manager. But I know none of these truthful words will
ever get thru little dickey's thick skull, because he has the
gambling disease and he has it good. But he knows I'm always here
when he needs me.
So now it's time to let the poor idiot have the last word to, as he
needs to say, "set the record straight" so he can at least try to
make himself feel good---sort of like he does with all that
nonsensical theory talk when it comes to justifying why he plays far
more than anyone like him ever should. In a way, i kind of actually
feel sorry for the bloke. I beat him up almost daily, and what's
worse, he even got clobbered when discussing a topic from his own
backyard--computers! Oh well, so goes life..... I'm gone from the
board and won't return as aces_hii any longer, and I'm VERY sorry
little dickey if I can't read your fuming rant to this one! Enjoy the
holidays!
···
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Being involved in gaming for quite some time now, I've come know many
people who simply decided that a move to LV was the right thing for
them to do generally over the past five years - and the trend is
growing. By and large, they've arrived into town from the Midwest or
the East coast, but a number have also come from next door in
California. The profiles of most of them are somewhat similar:
They're usually retired or have decided they no longer desire to
work; they consider themselves to be from society's middle class; and
they ALMOST ALL play video poker. But there is one very common thread
they all share that motivated them to actually put the plan into
motion -- every one of them believed beyond the shadow of a doubt
that they would have little or no trouble withdrawing money on an as-
needed basis from the many casinos - especially the not-so-savory
locals joints - around town. (And I thought it was because of the
weather!) It would be a cakewalk
.or so it seemed.
I've heard or read stories leading up to the move from the majority
of them, and I think I've talked to all but 3 since. As the move
developed, you could literally feel their blood begin to boil and
their hearts pounding faster with every passing day. For sure, a
major change as this in one's life has to be considered a positive,
but when a former recreational gambler knows they will soon be able
to play video poker almost at will instead of waiting for those trips
to Vegas or the nearby Indian casinos to materialize, the
anticipation goes sky-high. Few if any of them actually consider
they'll now be living in a large city experiencing a heck of a lot of
growing pains. No longer will they be secured inside of a beautiful
hotel along the Strip. The traffic can be strangulating at any time
of day, and in a town that "gives away" drinks to players, driving
can be a real crapshoot. They have blocked from their minds the fact
that wherever there is a lot of cash there is a draw for crime
which they may not be used to. Although each of these warrants
serious consideration, video poker players can see no further than
the hearts and flowers leading to town as they wipe their sweaty
palms. Once the compulsion sets in and they feed it, it's there to
stay. Normal ife as they knew it would never be the same again.
But what is it that gives video poker players such a bullish
attitude? What is it that makes them certain they will live off of or
supplement their income with video poker? This part is simple,
because I see it everyday. They've become enthralled with the
expectation that what the mathematicians calculate on paper based on
eternal perfect play, it will be an easy act to follow. All they need
do is play 100%+ games only, and because the plus sign is there it
automatically means they will win. Their comps will pay for their
food, they will have lots of "free" fun, and just about nothing can
go wrong. The best part of all this is they find comfort in words of
the hundreds and more who write on various video poker boards saying
it's a virtual lock simply play to the math, make no mistakes, play
as much and as often as you can, then you'll win and get everything
else for free! Hmmm
if only diets gave such guarantees. And guess
what? Have I ever mentioned that most video poker players in local
casinos are fat?
So if you're wondering why you haven't been one of the `lucky' ones
to ride this fantasy train to town, don't feel bad yet. First, if it
were oh so easy, wouldn't you expect several million of these `expert
players' to be moving in each year? Of course, but they're not
addicted to playing the game so they have no need to chase this magic
cure. When those who believe they will be living off of the casinos
finally snap out of it, what they'll wake up to is the stark fact
that the casinos are living off them! Generally, that pie-in-the-sky
ends up burning, and these unfortunate souls find themselves selling
property left back home, they trade down or are left with no vehicles
and resort to driving one of the many junkers on the roads of Las
Vegas, and they scramble through garage sale after garage sale. And
will they ever admit that it was their addiction that brought them to
the gambling mecca of the world? Will they ever admit that the
casinos are not spectacular and continually thriving due in part to
the huge contributions made by video poker players who think they can
beat the system? No, but they will go out of their way to sugar-coat
the experience that is until the day comes when their retirement
and savings accounts are drained dry.
The lesson here is to think before you let your gambling emotions
take over. Are you moving to Las Vegas for what you hope will be a
better quality of living - which is nearly impossible these days
unless you're coming in from a ghetto with no health care and a
dilapidated schooling system - or are you excited that you will be
closer to the lure of the machines? I now of no video poker player
who moved to play more often that did the right thing. You do? Just
give them time. Why? Because what do 99% of all gamblers do over time
unless they are extremely lucky? People, casinos and their slot clubs
are not there for us to be able to take advantage of them. Moving to
Las Vegas takes much more than money, because money doesn't last if
you move to gamble. It takes willpower, discipline, and other major
interests in life in order to have a successful move. If your main
attractions are eating, drinking, and video poker, you've made one
big mistake. And what of all the normal things you used to do in
life? What ever happened to the fun you used to have on simple
relaxing vacations 'away from it all'? Why can't you leave town even
for 4 hours without longing for the machines? It's spelled P-A-T-H-O-
L-O-G-I-C-A-L G-A-M-B-L-I-N-G folks, and if you're thinking about a
move to town, you'll be able to spell those words perfectly soon
enough and without the spaces, that is, if you can't already.......