Flushing It Out of Vegas - In Search of the Elusive Royal
Day Five - Fri Nov 10th, 2006
Clumping.
I call it clumping.
How many times have I read about you fine folks having these weird
events where, say, you're playing on some machine and you hit a royal
and while waiting to be paid play the machine next to you and hit a
royal on that one too? Or hit three in an hour or some crazy thing.
It happens, right? It *has* to happen.
My theory was that our dearth of Royals over the last 10 years was
going to be counteracted by an act of Clumping and I'd told Mrs.
Flusher this over and over the past few months - perhaps to bolster my
courage, but I honestly believed it. Partly.
Now, with a Royal under my belt, I was ready to keep going. Mrs. F
deserved one too, and maybe we could get some Clumping going.
Maybe.
We started early again - although going going going for 18 hours a day
was making us gone weary... but what good would it do to have had a
casino just 20 steps from our room at the ElCo and not play in it in a
weeks time when I was back in my cubicle, slaving my ass off for The
Man?
I counted - from room 5508 (which you can probably see from the
Methadone clinic a block east of Las Vegas Blvd.) you can make it to
the casino in just 20 steps. Suck it up, mega-casinos! Who needs your
spas and fancy carpets and talking statues and clean food! We were
livin' the 'dust joint life in all its glory.
Here's a typical morning run on Bonus Poker. We played about 1000
hands each. Mrs. Flusher up $115. Me, down $140. See how that works?
Why can't I have a birthday every day? (Because I'd be like 11,000
years old, that's why.) She hit two sets of quads drawing from three
and four. I hit none.
We keep records and this time I decided after a couple of days to
prove my theory that more quads come from held pairs than trips. I
even counted the number of times I drew from trips without getting a
quad on a number of occasions, and got to wayyyyyyyy more than the 23
or so tries it should take on average to fill a quad. I'd get up to 45
before hitting sometimes.
I have a wacky theory on why this is. Given ten potential cards to be
dealt, split into two groups of five, the dealt and drawn cards, when
a quad is split two and two, you hold it in most cases. But when the
split is 3 and 1, every other time the three cards are in the draw
cards and you don't hold the one. Now I ain't know mathematician but I
thinks I's awnta sumthin here. Jazbo, Wizard, somebody help me out
here.
I had a quick breakfast of second hand smoke, eggs, hash browns,
toast, and hot brown stuff at the counter in Careful Kittys, paying
with points. I loved every clogged alveolar minute of it.
Then it was on to the scene of yesterday's success, Fitzgeralds for
some BP. Mrs. Flusher held AA and drew AA for AAAA. YAAAAY! $100 in
quarters. Love those coin droppers! There's nothing like the way the
crud tattoos the inside of your fingernails for days afterwards.
I managed my first quad in 1200 hands (5555, held 2). That was no fun
at all. Soon thereafter I held 2 and nailed 4444 for $50.
Next stop, the Four Queens for some JoB. We thought we'd start play
here because it was our next 2-night port of call. I'd had a hard time
even getting a room for the weekend but managed casino rate at the FQ.
We figured we've give a lot of play and hopefully see some comps.
I have a little shortform for quads - you are probably getting tired
of hearing about every stupid one but this report is for us as well as
our somewhat loyal readers. (KKK)K means quad kings, held 3. Easy
Peasy. And that's what I got next.
Back to the ElCo to check out and settle up. We had a bill of $92.01 -
most of it was the Robertas dinner. We went to the slot club and
talked to a host and got a $30 comp for lunch with a 3 day expiry.
We'd use this some other time.
We checked into the FQ and had a problem with our room - a pillow
soiled with some red substance. Not wanting to dwell on it we got
moved immediately. Nobody apologized and we were really disgusted as I
had been lying on said pillow when Mrs. F shrieked "DON'T. MOVE." I'm
saying it was nail polish.
Yuk.
We got a 241 for Magnolias (birthday month) and used that back at the
FQ for lunch. I had a very forgettable Philly Cheesesteak (not
recommended) and Mrs. Flusher her venerable club sandwich. She seems
to thrive on those things and eats them at every turn when on a
gambling trip.
Down to the BP/JoB uprights west of the craps tables - I hit 7(777),
and Mrs. F. 8(888), (KK)KK, and (JJJ)J.
The quads were coming today, and after a rest I nailed (9)9(99) and
(55)55 and 66(66). Mrs. Flusher racked up two quads herself. Gasp. No
records on these? For shame Royal Flusher! For. Shame!
We were really pounding out the hands of JoB and looking for that
clumping action. But we tired out before nailing anything
earthshattering like a Royal.
Time to unwind a bit at the 'Gate, Just for laughs I took a shot with
a $5 bill on a short pay Bonus Deluxe machine and pulled (333)3 for an
easy $100. Went well with my Jack on ice. Damn I love quads!
Over at MSS, I proved once again that my time-space continuum is bent
and was dealt four Aces - on deuces wild. At least I got a $5 scratch
card. For those of you that have been keeping score, I had yet to hit
four bullets on Bonus Poker all trip.
We settled into the JoB and Mrs. F racked four 10s.
It had been a long day of ups and downs but no real traction. Mrs. F
went bye bye to beddy byes but I was hungry, so I grabbed the rib
special at Magnolias. $6.40 for a 1 lb rack with players card.
Simply: DON'T MISS THE RIB SPECIAL AT MAGNOLIA'S AT THE FOUR
QUEENS!!!! Excellent grub.
I got on a hot craps table and turned my $50 stake into $113. A black
chip to show Mrs. F in the morning. Nice way to end another great day
in this great great town.
The Score
···
=========
Quads: forty three
Straight Flushes: three
Aces on BP: one
Deuces: zero
T-shirts: eight
Elusive Royals Flush: ONE 
More to come...
Royal Flusher