A good, but long RF story copied from LV Talk....
JimboRob
Regular User
Joined: Apr 26, 2005
Posts: 6
Posted: Thu Sep 15, 2005 9:58 am Post subject: It really CAN
happen.....because it just happened to me!
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It was as about as close to an "out of body" experience that I have
ever had. It was almost as if it happened to somebody else, and I was
just an onlooker.......but, man, it was sweet when the reality finally
set in.
For those that might recall my previous trip reports, you are aware
that my reports contain a great deal of detail and, as a result, the
length of these reports have been unforgivably long. Consequently, I
am going to forego writing about the entire trip this time around.
(Read: I'm too friggin' lazy to write it)
I would be remiss, however, if I didn't at least relate to you the
highlight of this trip just concluded (Sept 8 - 12, Caesars Palace).
Indeed, what I'm about to describe to you was not only the highlight
of this trip, but of all past (and almost certainly, all future)
visits to Las Vegas. This will be very detailed, as I want to, as much
as possible, put you in my shoes and let you relive the experience
with me.
Let me set the stage: It was Saturday evening at about 8pm. I came
down from my room (again, Caesars) to have a significantly lengthy
session at video poker. I had no other plans for the evening. Just
some VP and some Heineken consumption.
The casino was crowded. I was in the Palace Casino and my favorite
slant-top $1 triple-play 9/6 JoB machines were all occupied. Damn.
Caesars has a bunch of these machines, but I prefer the slant-tops.
Oh, well. I then moseyed on over to the bank of machines that are
uprights (kind of diagonally across from the Terrazza restaurant). Two
of the machines were available. Ok, then. Let's get down to business.
There was a lady playing one of the outside machines. My plan was to
play the other outside machine. I stepped between the outside chair
and the middle chair, fishing in my pocket for my player's card. You
would have thought I had just committed a heinous crime.
"You can't play this machine" the lady said to me rather curtly,
referring to the middle machine. "I'm playing it".
Now, I can semi-understand why a person would play two slot machines
at the same time. There's no thinking involved, you just push buttons,
and one of the machines might be set to pay off at a higher percentage
than the other. That's fine. But video poker??? You can't play any
faster playing two machines simultaneously, because you have to
analyze each hand separately. So, I can only conclude that this
genius' line of thinking might be that one machine was "hotter" than
the other and, damn it, she was going to find out exactly which one it
was. Brilliant.
I informed the lady that I was planning on playing the other outside
machine. She just said, "Oh", and kept playing without even looking up
at me. I am not fond of rude people, but I didn't say a word otherwise.
Insert player's card. Insert $1000. Swivel my head looking for a
cocktail waitress. None around. She'll be here eventually. Let's get
started.
The reason I enjoy $1 JoB triple play is that it is not nearly as
volatile as the other games, and yet you can still put a substantial
amount of play on your card ($15 per hand). Nevertheless, you still
need a decent bankroll to sustain yourself for a four night trip (my
bankroll was $7k, and when I sat down at this machine on this night I
was down about $1200 to that point).
I played for about an hour at this level. The Heinekens were coming
regularly. For this hour I never got more than $150 up or down. Things
were very consistent.......and I started to get bored.
And when I get bored while gambling, bad things usually begin to happen.
On my previous trip in April, the way I combated boredom was to jump
to the $5 level and play FIVE hands at a time. As documented in that
particular trip report, I got pummeled (to the tune of a $4500 loss in
a relative short time frame).
But I'm much wiser now. I switched to the $5 level, but I kept the
machine at THREE hands.
Here's the caveat - I was only going to do this for a total of 25
hands, and then I would switch back to the $1 level. Sounds like a plan.
(And I bet that, by now, you have figured out where I'm going with this.)
On hand #8, four to the royal popped up in spades. Only the Jack was
missing.
Whoa........whoa.........instant adrenaline rush.
I pulled my hand back from the machine as if it had just given me an
electrical shock. And then I quickly reached back and held the four
spades. I again pulled my hand back without hitting the "draw" button.
I wanted to savor the moment for a bit. What I felt in my gut at this
point is, in my opinion, why people might get addicted to gambling.
They want to experience this feeling.
I stared at the screen for about 15 seconds, with particular focus on
the "$5" icon at the bottom. I knew the potential. A 3 in 48 chance at
$20,000.
I distinctly recall turning my head and looking at the lady who was
still playing her two machines. Apparently she was still undecided as
to which of the two was the hottest. Oh, it would be so sweet to see
the expression on her face if I indeed hit this royal.
I turned my focus back to the machine. Enough savoring, Jimbo. It's
time to push the button.
My final thought was this: Do NOT allow yourself to be too
disappointed if (when) it doesn't hit.
I pushed the button.
They say that one thing the great athletes have in common is their
innate ability to focus at a very high level; their brains can process
information about their surrounding environment so quickly that,
paradoxically, everything around them seems to slow down.
I'm certainly not a great athlete, but my brain had reached, at least
for a few seconds, this level of focus.When the Jack of Spades filled
in on the second line, everything seemed to become slow and surreal. I
cannot think of a better way to describe it. It was a very odd feeling.
The screen on the machine was telling me to call an attendant. No
need. Three of them were on me as if they were flies and was a piece
of........hey, wait a minute......that's a TERRIBLE analogy. You know
what I mean. They came quickly.
And I can suggest a new use for that music the machine plays when a
W2-G jackpot is hit. Put a video poker machine in room with a criminal
from whom you want to extract a confession. Play the music and leave
the room. Within a half hour you will not only have your confession,
you will have him singing like a canary about past crimes, including
that Snickers bar he pocketed at the 7-11 when he was 8 years old
("JUST MAKE IT STOP!!!"). I had that damn ditty going through my head
all night.
With all the excitement and the congratulations from the floor people,
I almost forgot to look over at my friend two machines down. Oh, why
didn't I have my camera with me. Her face was a mask of disbelief and
jealousy. Our eyes locked for a second. I gave her a big smile, and a
quick wink of the eye. I was tempted to say, "Thanks for not letting
me play the middle machine", but that would have been a low blow, so I
didn't. Just for the record - she did not offer any congratulations.
I requested a check for the $20k. The FP informed me that this would
take 45 minutes to an hour to process (*****; they just want to give
you cash so they have a shot at getting some of their money back). OK,
I'll take the cash then, knowing damn well that this was going
directly into the room safe and it was not coming out of there until
it was time to go home.
I called my wife in Connecticut on my cell. It was after midnight
there, but I didn't think she would mind me waking her up with this
type of news. I was correct; she didn't mind.
The FP eventually came back with four banded stacks of $5000 in
hundred dollar bills.
"I counted it three times, but I'll count it in front of you if you
wish", he told me. No, I'll take your word for it. Let's get this in
the safe ASAP. He asked me if I wanted an envelope to carry the money.
No. No, I want to skip through the casino waving $20,000 in cash over
my head while singing "We're in the Money" like Ethel Merman.
Yes, please. I'd like an envelope.
I printed the ticket for the remaining money in the machine, and I
made my way up to my room (I'm not going to kid you - I must have
looked over my shoulder 20 times in the process to see if anyone was
following me. I also made a point to have an elevator to myself).
The question that might loom in your mind, then, is this: OK, hot
shot, not counting the $20k hit, how else did you do as far as gambling?
Answer: Not so hot. I dropped $4500 of my original $7k bankroll, most
of it after the royal.
Let's do some arithmetic (and today, boys and girls, we're going to
concentrate on subtraction). Let's see: $20,000 Royal Flush. Subtract
$4500 for other gambling losses. Uncle Sam is going to want a piece of
the pie (at 28%), so let's subtract another $5600. So, suddenly, I'm
down to $9900.
But wait! There's more subtraction!
When I arrived home I gave my wife $2000. I told her to buy some
things for herself that she normally would not spend money on. She
thanked me, and as she walked away I thought I heard her mumbling
something about a `pool boy'.
Next in line with her hand out was my 11-year old daughter. I gave her
$100. She thanked me, and as she walked away I thought I heard her
mumbling something about a `cheapskate'.
I bought myself a nice set of Callaway irons I have been eyeballing
for some time, along with some other golf accessories. This cost about
a grand.
Easy come, easy go. But, of course, it was an experience I will never
forget.
And, finally, that's it. My Lord, if I had written about the entire
trip.......well......we don't want to think about that prospect, do we?